HUMAN TO HUMAN: WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW BEFORE WE SAY HELLO
Have you pondered the idea of going to therapy for quite awhile? Maybe, you have finally scheduled it and plan to go, but can’t help but to feel conflicted about your decision.
If you have ever had the desire to connect with another person and spill your problems, I’d venture you are just as human as the person next to you. We all desire to connect, to be understood, and find peace in our lives. So WHY can it be so difficult to pick up the phone and make an appointment for therapy?
Anxiety, fear, insecurity, and overwhelment. This is common when taking the first step towards sitting on our couch. Why is this so common? Read on for the top three things I've heard are blocks toward therapy, and solutions to these concerns.
You don't know what to expect:
Maybe the appointment has been made and the date is approaching fast. Anxiety is starting to build because you don’t know what to expect. Will you and the therapist get along? Will you be pressured to make changes that you aren’t ready for? The answer, quite simply, is not at all. The first session is just getting to know you and making sure we as therapists are a good fit for you and your concerns.
Don’t be afraid to ask us about who we are as therapists, how we approach various types of concerns, as well as techniques we might use in therapy. Building rapport is the foundation for good therapy. The alliance of therapist and individual has to be built on trust. When trust is present, only then can we truly go to work on what is bothering you. Additionally, we will meet you where you are.
Our job isn’t to grab your hand and drag you to a solution, rather walk alongside you where you are comfortable venturing toward.
Spilling your life to a stranger:
How many times in your life have you met a new person, said hello, and told them your life story? This is not a natural daily interaction. Usually the things discussed in therapy are things you’ve either kept to yourself, or told to those in your circle of trust. When thinking about telling your story, it’s natural to feel insecure that judgment may be placed upon you by this individual that you have allowed into your circle for the hour.
In essence, telling your story to a therapist, that starts as a stranger, is one of the most effective pieces of therapy. We are a blank slate for you. You have no fears of being a burden on us.
Our entire goal is to open our hearts and minds in an effort to help you work through being human, because we are human too and know it can be difficult. There is no pressure for you to check in with us on our day, we care about you and your reason for spending the hour with us. Being with you in your struggle, is one of our greatest passions.
Mental health stigma:
Stigma is quite literally the lack of understanding about a topic, and mental health has one of the largest stigmas. If you go to therapy, you may be insecure about being deemed crazy or weak because you cannot find a solution on your own. Let me be clear, your mental health is just as important as your physical health. Just like you would take an aspirin to attend to a headache, we must take steps to attend to the soul. Only when we are proud of ourselves for taking steps forward can we fight the shame that may come with making a mental health appointment.
I like to look at children when fighting this stigma. You may have even been told growing up to “pull yourself up by your bootstraps or I’ll give you something to cry about”. When we look at children and their behaviors, we see that if we allow them to lean into the emotion they are feeling, oftentimes they are able to process and move on with their day, the issue that bothered them is no longer a concern. As adults, we need to allow ourselves to do the same. Some things you cannot fix yourself. Many things in life are too large to carry alone. Let us sit with you and help carry the load.
If you are anxious about your appointment, let's talk about it. The journey to find yourself is scary, but one of the most beautiful steps you can take. We are human too, we have felt the same emotions and have certainly struggled. Let us walk with you and work as a team towards a thriving life.
Written by Ashley Carter, LPCC – Thrive Marriage and Family Counseling, Grand Junction, CO.